U.S. To Merge War on Drugs with War on Terror

Nearly five months after 9/11, as public sentiment was yet coming to terms with the brutal attacks in Washington and New York, the spurious link between drugs and terrorism first came to the forefront of public consciousness during Super Bowl XXXVI. The Office of National Drug Control Policy (ONDCP) wasted no time in seizing upon the impressionable minds of 130 million captive viewers who were psychologically burnt out on 9/11 (dis)information, informing us that buying dope funds international terrorist organizations. The Republican true believers bristled with a warm wave of patriotic sentiment, calling for renewed efforts in their hallowed War on Drugs, while those who happened to be smoking pot during this most sacred of sporting events lifted an eyebrow in consternation. They thought they were buying it from "Bob" down the street, and in doing so, funding "Bob's" personal War on Poverty. Little did they know.

How convenient that the link between suicide bombers and marijuana remained unknown for twenty years until right after we had been attacked. Potheads everywhere could only feel shame, knowing that perhaps it was the bag they bought from "Bob" that provided that final $50 the terrorists needed to carry out their attacks.

That was back in February of 2002, and since then such a link has been largely ignored. I guess that when the same people who told us that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction and ties to Bin Laden also tell us that our local growers a somehow a part of a vast Al Qaida network, we tend to get a little skeptical about anything terror related. Yet at a press conference on Thursday, July 12, 2007, White House Drug Czar John Walters unwittingly made known the Federal Government's nefarious intention of merging the two wars into one. The czar is quoted as urging people to overcome their "reefer blindness", and branding marijuana growers terrorists dedicated to the destruction of America.