Easing School Anxiety

For many young children this up coming September will be a new phase in their development. Starting school can be very exciting and scary. Parents can do a lot to help easy those anxieties and help with the transition from summer to school.

First thing to keep in mind is validate the child's concerns. Going to school may not seem like a big deal to an adult but for children that isn't so. Simply stating, "I know going to school can be scary," is a lot better then just shrugging it off. As an adult starting a new job or relationship can be nerve racking, that is what a child does when they go to school; they start a new job and relationship.

For preschool and kindergarten age children school can be very nerve racking because they have never been away from their caregivers for long periods of time. The fist and best thing to do for this transition is set-up a schedule. Schedules put children at ease because it helps give them structure. For a child to know what is going to happen next helps ease some of the anxiety. Starting a schedule for school on the first day of school is not beneficial. It is more productive and helpful if you start easing the child into the new schedule a few weeks earlier.

Saying goodbye when dropping a child off can be hard for the child and parent. If you know your child has separation anxiety let his or her teacher know. This way the teacher can help with the process. Give your child a time limit, say, "I can only stay for 5 minutes then I have to leave." Show the child a watch or clock so he or she have a physical reminder. Sometimes children will cry or ask for one more hug or kiss. If you give one more, often it will not end there. State that, "I gave you a hug and kiss and now I have to go." Having clear boundaries and enforcing them is the best approach.

There are some helpful hints parents can use to help with the anxiety besides introducing a new schedule.

1. Pack a picture of the family in his/her lunch box. Let the child know if they feel lonely that they can look at the picture.

2. Pack an item like a small scarf that has the parents sent on it. This is helpful when children feel sad and need something familiar.