Casualties of War: Children of Vietnam Veterans

By Goodnatured, published Aug 20, 2007
Published Content: 39  Total Views: 2,928  Favorited By: 2 CPs
Rating: 4.0 of 5
My father was young when he entered the service, it was go to war or go to jail, so he chose the military. He left behind a young wife and two young daughters. He never really came home again.

My father was never the same when he came home. He was forced into the service and he decided to go airborne. My father used to hitchhike home about every weekend to see us. His military record shows many article 15 for AWOL, late coming back to duty on Monday morning. One Monday he left and would not come home for quite some time, he was on his way to Vietnam. I wanted to write this article because I think that there are casualties of war that should be recognized. The children of theVietnam veterans, some of us lost our fathers in war and some of us lost our fathers after the war.

My father was a young, blond, handsome man, he could turn a ladies head in a heartbeat. He came home and things did not work out between my mother and my father. I have a brother that resulted from another relationship that looks just like my dad. My father was spirited and raised a little hell, out ran the cops, little disorderly conduct but nothing real serious.

My father came home a different man, he was careless and drank a lot. I used to take his whiskey bottle, empty it and fill it with water, there came a time, once he would be so drunk he would not know the difference. He worked his job in the coal mine and drank, that was his life. He would get in that old convertible, put the roof down and go as fast as he could. It became obvious he had a death wish and truly needed help, help that he never received.

My father took his life in March 1972, he was 27 years old. His children were 6 and 5 year old girls and an infant son.

My father was found with the phone cord wrapped around him as if he was doing circles. The gunshot wound to his chest symbolized to me that his heart was no longer there. I don't know if that was what he was trying to say but that is how I interpreted.

I miss my father, I missed him every time I ran into trouble and he wasn't there to give me advice, I missed him at my graduation from high school, the military and college.

Comments
Showing Comments 1 - 15 of 15
 
 
My dad is a Vietnam Vet, he has been through two marriages, has a drinking problem and suffers from bi-polar. He has nightmares and sleep Apnea. I am drained... he was not around much when I was growing up. I never new where he was until I moved him back to MN. He does not talk about what happened yet his sleep tells more.

Posted on 06/26/2008 at 10:06:34 PM

 
'i am the daughter of a australian vietnam veteran. i always say i wish i knew the guy before the war? my dad had post traumatic stress disorder from being involved in war.I never had a real father,the man i knew,would drink get angry,and also very sad.' this is how I feel too- my dad had ptsd too

Posted on 06/10/2008 at 4:06:17 AM

 
My dad is Vietnam Vet. He has PTSD. He was an alcoholic and homeless for many years. I am only 20years old and my father is still alive. It is so hard to see him go through what he is going through. Not knowing when he is going to go off next. I feel like sometimes I am the only one that feels this way. That someone you love deeply is hurting and there is nothing that you can do about it. I hate that feeling. I want it to change

Posted on 05/17/2008 at 1:05:16 PM

 
Has this site changed?

Posted on 05/02/2008 at 9:05:50 PM

 
I completely understand!!!! I know my dad loves me, but it has been an interesting life.

Posted on 05/02/2008 at 8:05:53 PM

 
Yes--there are health problems related to children of Vietnam Vets. Their is research and you can find on the internet. Fertility is one of them, I have read that before.

Posted on 05/02/2008 at 8:05:51 PM

 
An Australian study has found that Children of Vets have a higher suicide rate.. Three times higher than the average.. There are other health problems that may be related to our fathers exposure to Agent Orange... If anyone would like to share.. I am wondering if any Children of Vietnam Vets have any medical issues you feel may be related to agent orange? I am having fertility problems.. and anxiety issues related to having a father with PTSD....

Posted on 03/31/2008 at 10:03:59 PM

 
My father has PTSD and was given 100% disability related to Vietnam...I wish I would have known him before the war also... I love my Dad but he has a quick temper... It has been difficult to have a relationship with him...

Posted on 03/31/2008 at 10:03:30 PM

 
I think that all of the children of Veterans should come together and write a book based on our experiences as a child. So much torment goes through the minds of Veterans. So much pain and suffering. I could not begin to imagine how it was/is for my father. My father is a Vietnam Veteran. So far his experiences and trauma has taken it's toll on 2 marriages for him, he has also attempted suicide, he has been an alcoholic and a drug addict, he still, to this day, has nightmares. My father cannot even enjoy the 4th of July without constant jumping from the bangs of the fireworks. I call to check up on him every year on that night, just to make sure he is ok. Thankfully, he has since been to rehab, over 15 years clean actually. I am very proud of him and his strength to keep going. I have 2 daughters and 2 stepdaughters that he loves and cherishes (and spoils) more than anything. My father has lived a hard life since the war. He too, has gone without many of the necessities and

Posted on 03/28/2008 at 10:03:29 PM

 
I think that all of the children of Veterans should come together and write a book based on our experiences as a child. So much torment goes through the minds of Veterans. So much pain and suffering. I could not begin to imagine how it was/is for my father. My father is a Vietnam Veteran. So far his experiences and trauma has taken it's toll on 2 marriages for him, he has also attempted suicide, he has been an alcoholic and a drug addict, he still, to this day, has nightmares. My father cannot even enjoy the 4th of July without constant jumping from the bangs of the fireworks. I call to check up on him every year on that night, just to make sure he is ok. Thankfully, he has since been to rehab, over 15 years clean actually. I am very proud of him and his strength to keep going. I have 2 daughters and 2 stepdaughters that he loves and cherishes (and spoils) more than anything. My father has lived a hard life since the war. He too, has gone without many of the necessities and

Posted on 03/28/2008 at 10:03:29 PM

 
I run a website for Daughters of Vietnam Veterans www.dovv.net

Posted on 03/28/2008 at 6:03:15 PM

 
I am a daughter of a Vietnam Vet. My earliest childhood memory is of my fathers hands around my neck. I was about 4. I grew up constantly on guard, not knowing when he was going to "click" again. Dad would often stare in the distance, I would wonder what he was thinking of, but of course he would never tell me. Now that I'm older, I understand that he had PTSD, which I too have since been diagnosed with. Dad held a gun to Mum, yelling that he was going to kill us. I was 11 & it broke my heart to have to call the police. I didn't understand why Dad had mud on his face & twigs in his hat, but of course I do now - he was having a flashback. Actually everyday was a flashback. Dad died 10 years ago, and since then I have learnt so much about what happened over there & would do anything just to hold him one more time to tell him that I love him, forgive him & that I;m proud of him. Rest in peace Dad, for you are no longer haunted.

Posted on 03/15/2008 at 11:03:32 PM

 
MY dad lived his whole life with alot of anger in his soul, when my dad returned he tried to committ suicide, so all his life he was disabled, and tried to get service connected until the day he died 7 years ago it was pending for 30 years.All my friends tell me I need to write about a book about my childhood, it was not a normal childhood at all, I try to forgive him, while growing up we did without alot, we barely had enough food to eat, barely enough clothing to wear and even now my mom is still doing without, her sticking by his side all those years, even after the abuse. I just feel I need to tell my story and make a difference.

Posted on 12/13/2007 at 7:12:50 AM

 
I've been married to a disabled (PTDS) Vietnam Vet since 1978. The wars do not end when the warriors come on. They continue to do battle within their minds for years and years. I've been told by a VA doctor that only 10% of Vietnam marriage are long term like ours. Peace Love Stardove

Posted on 09/18/2007 at 1:09:00 PM

 
i am the daughter of a australian vietnam veteran. i always say i wish i knew the guy before the war? my dad had post traumatic stress disorder from being involved in war.I never had a real father,the man i knew,would drink get angry,and also very sad. my dad commited suicide nearly 4 years ago.just as the war in iraq started again.Thats when i realised he didnt leave vietnam all them years ago,he has always been fighting in vietnam.And another thing he did was bring the vietnam war home to us. :( i didnt realise this but i to have also been fighting the war in vietnam.

Posted on 09/17/2007 at 10:09:00 PM

Type in Your Comments Below - (1000 characters left)
Your name:

Submit your own content on this or any topic. Get started »
Showing Comments 1 - 15 of 15
 
Most Commented On