When Friends Become Family - Dealing with the Good and the Bad

Learning that a friend will become a member of your family through marriage can arouse a number of emotions. Joy, wariness and even anxiety to name just a few. While a friend becoming a family member can bring forth nothing but happiness and make your relationship that much closer, be advised that changes are in store and they may not all be so pleasant. I have experienced this twice. One friend is no longer a member of my family, and unfortunately no longer my friend, and the other is my sister in law and good friend to this day. The following is what I have learned can happen when friends become family.

Relationships Change. Whether you have been friends for two years or twenty years, your relationship will change. Your relationship with your friend will undergo changes, as well as your relationship with your relative. It may be that you used to vent to your friend about family issues and to your relative about situations involving your friend. Suddenly the two are one and you must be more censored in what you say about one in the company of the other. Complaining about your best friend's recent coldness to your brother when your best friend is now your brother's wife is not the wisest idea. Talking about people behind their back rather than confronting the person straight on is never the best idea, but let's face it, we all need to vent now and again. If you normally went to your friend for tea and sympathy after a particularly stressful family event, that will have to change. By acknowledging this fact and being sensitive to the fact that your lovable, but sometimes annoying birth family is now your friend's family by marriage, you can avoid an uncomfortable situation or two.