Find » Society » The Disadvantages of Informing Adul...

The Disadvantages of Informing Adult Children that Their Parent is Dying

By Sophie, published Aug 23, 2007
Published Content: 1,207  Total Views: 654,165  Favorited By: 160 CPs
Embed:  
Rating: 4.7 of 5
In a previous article, we looked at some of the advantages of informing adult children that their parent is dying. In this article, we shall look at some of the disadvantages of doing so.

Grief Will Not Lessen


It does not matter whether a child hears of their parent's death weeks in advance or on the day of their parent's death. It will still cause a tremendous amount of pain and suffering. Those feelings will not lessen simply by telling children in advance of what will occur. So it is important to bear this in mind before informing your children of what will be taking place.

Pity

Sometimes knowing that their parent will die causes adult children to take pity on their parent. However, most parents do not want to have their children gazing at them with pity in their eyes every time they come to visit. It can ruin what time there is left to enjoy one another's company and it can turn family gatherings into very sombre occasions.

Fear of Death


Regardless of how the parent may feel about their impending death, their children may develop a morbid fear of what will occur. The longer they know that their parent will die, the longer they have to imagine all sorts of dreadful scenarios. Will their parent be in a lot of pain? What exactly will happen at the point of death? Will they be able to be present? These and many other questions can plague an adult child who has a lot of time to contemplate their parent's last moments of life.

Grandchildren

If you have recently heard that your parent is suffering from a terminal illness and you have children of your own, this can be an especially hard time to cope with. You will be feeling sad over the fact that you will be losing your parent in death. But you will also have to come to terms with the fact that you will have to deal with raising your children without the input and influence of your parent. Gaining this knowledge means you must also decide if you will tell your children the news that their grandparent is dying. Imagine what this knowledge will do to your children.

The Disadvantages of Informing Adult Children that Their Parent is Dying

Hold on tight to what time you have left

Credit: freepixels.com

Copyright: freepixels.com

Takeaways
  • Grief will not lessen if you know of your parent's terminal illness in advance
  • If you know what will happen, you may be consumed with feelings of pity
  • The longer you know, the longer you have to develop a fear of death
Did You Know?
If you have children of your own, you must decide if you will tell your children the news that their grandparent is dying
Comments
Comments 1 - 9 of 9
 
 
Good article. I was achild that went through this and I don't think there is a right way to tell a child. Read my article A Lost Childhood.

Posted on 12/21/2007 at 8:12:12 AM

 
There maybe disadvantages, but I would rather know.

Posted on 08/27/2007 at 9:08:00 PM

 
:-)

Posted on 08/25/2007 at 10:08:00 AM

 
This has to be one of the hardest things to ever have to deal with. I'm so grateful I haven't had to do this yet. Although, with my husband's father being so ill a few weeks ago, it definately gave us a little taste. It was terrible. Good article

Posted on 08/25/2007 at 5:08:00 AM

 
Wow, a tough subject. Great job!

Posted on 08/24/2007 at 10:08:00 PM

 
its so sad in any event...

Posted on 08/23/2007 at 4:08:00 PM

 
Thanks for the comments. I agree with you, Carol. Sophie

Posted on 08/23/2007 at 11:08:00 AM

 
I will have to go back and read the other part. My reaction to this one is that an adult child would feel betrayed if his/her parent kept impending death a secret.

Posted on 08/23/2007 at 11:08:00 AM

 
These are all really good points. Informing anyone about terminal illnesses is never easy.

Posted on 08/23/2007 at 10:08:00 AM

Type in Your Comments Below - (1000 characters left)
Your name:

Submit your own content on this or any topic. Get started »
Comments 1 - 9 of 9
 
Advertisment