Grief Recovery

Grief is a normal and natural reaction to any loss that changes our life. The death of a loved one is often the biggest change that we experience, but estrangement, divorce, health issues, or financial hardship may also bring on feelings of loss and despair.

Each of us reacts to grief in a different way and there are no "stages" or set amounts of time that are the same for everyone. The loss of a loved one may cause us to feel sadness, happiness, anger, relief, or fear. Allowing ourselves to feel these emotions, and not suppressing them, lets us work through the grieving process more effectively.

Society has certain perceptions of those who are grieving, and those perceptions may restrict our ability to recover from grief. We are taught these perceptions from an early age and may allow ourselves to be manipulated by them.

Those who are in mourning are often told they need to "keep busy." We may fill our time with tasks and chores, only to find ourselves not only still heartbroken, but exhausted, at the end of the day.

Well-meaning friends may tell us that "you should be over it by now." We feel that something must be wrong with us if we are still grieving months or years after the death.

People often think that those who are grieving do not wish to talk about the death or that they want to be left alone. Those in mourning may find themselves abandoned by friends who simply don't know what to do or say to them, when a sympathetic ear or invitation to a social outing may be what they need most.

We are conditioned from an early age to believe that painful feelings should be hidden. Emotional public displays are often forbidden. We don't want to be judged or criticized.