Get Toddlers to Behave, Share and Play Nicely Together

Toddlers are sometimes very stingy with their toys or don't choose to play well with others. But, is there a way to get toddlers to share their toys and play nicely?

Well, yes and no.
Some toddlers enjoy interacting with others in their play and some don't.

Developmentally, actively playing together formally may not come until the ages of three to five. Each child is different. However, to diffuse problems with sharing toys, you will have to interfere quite frequently.

Time out does not really work for those under four all the time because their attention spans may be short and they are likely to forget why they were there and they may not have fully understood in the first place.

Here is one method I have found to be very effective.

Step 1:
When one toddler is picking on the other, remove the offender from the situation and distract each one. Bend down to the offending child's level. Firmly say "No, (insert kid's name here). That's not very nice. Now you'll have to play over here."

Take him or her to another area of the room or yard.

Then, let the others continue as they were and give the offender a "busy" toy.

Step 2:
After a few minutes, go back to the offending child and get on his or her level again. Firmly, but calmly ask "Are you ready to share/play nice with everyone now"?

They usually say yes. If they say no, say "It looks like you need a few more minutes over here" and walk away. Repeat step 2 until the child is ready to cooperate.

Overview:
When using this method, it is key that it be repeated each and every time the child repeats the negative action. This may mean it needs to be repeated over and over again, but, eventually the children will learn to get along with another. Children learn by consistency of repetitive actions.

The action of removing a child from a negative situation that he or she created teaches that child over time that when he behaves negatively, there are consequences.