George W. Bush's Latest Iraq Strategy: Finding a Replacement Daddy to Bail Him Out of yet Another Mess

Having failed in his delusion of grandeur promise to bring democracy to Iraq and set in motion a domino effect that would spread throughout the region, Pres. Bush now has just one last objective in mind for his Iraq strategy. In case you've lost count, this would be objective number 437. Admittedly not quite as grand as the original mission to do what no one else had been capable of doing for a thousand years or so, at least Pres. Bush has finally discovered an objective that can be accomplished. Following a pattern that has followed him throughout his life, Pres. Bush is rallying around a slogan made famous in a classic Simpsons episode: "Can't Somebody Else Do It?"

The history of George W. Bush has been one that basically follows this pattern: George tries to do something, either because he's an idiot or drunk he fails and gets himself into a mess, then he gets mommy and daddy to bail him out. Now, of course, most of us have followed this pattern ourselves, but either not to the extent or not to the age that George did. More to point: most of us haven't done so as leader of the free world. At his age, in his position, George W. Bush should be mature enough to clean up his own messes. Alas, that is not the case.

In his drinking days, George regularly got involved in dirty little messes involving either complaints from citizens or the law and in all but one famous case he got his mommy and daddy to bail him out. When Georgie was faced with the unsettling prospect of actually having to fight and even possibly die for his convictions in Vietnam, he got his mommy and daddy and granpappy to bail him out. When George became quite possibly the only scion of an oil-rich family from Texas to ever fail at becoming an oil businessman himself...well, you get the picture.