The Finest Friends: How Do You Rate?

The only way to have a friend is to be one.
(Ralph Waldo Emerson)

What makes a true friend? Here are a dozen traits, coupled with insightful quotations on the values of friendship.

You may wish to see how you measure up, before you begin rating your friends.

Acceptance

Do you love your friend just the way he or she is? Are you embarrassed by your friend, when others are around? Does your friend's appearance make you squirm, if he or she appears in public in an odd hairstyle or outfit? If more popular people invite you to an event, are you willing to leave your friend behind? Which friends are most important to you? What makes a BFF (best friend forever)? Why?

"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out." (Walter Winchell)

Authenticity

Do you let your closest friends see who you really are? Do you talk and act the same way with each of your friends? Are you the same person at home, at school, at work, and everywhere else? Do you keep personal secrets or hidden habits from your friends? Do you have a best friend, or BFF? Does this person know who you really are?

"The best mirror is an old friend." (George Herbert)

Availability

Friendships take time. Are you willing to make the effort to spend time with your friends? Are you available when they need you? If a friend calls you in the middle of the night, will you answer your phone?

"Friends show their love in times of trouble..." (Euripedes)

Compassion

Do you feel sad when your friend is hurting? Can you count your friend's needs before your own at times? Are you willing to do whatever you can to help your friend when he or she needs it?

"A sympathetic friend can be quite as dear as a brother." (Homer)

Encouragement

Are you a good listener? Someone has said, "Everyone hears what you say, but a real friend actually listens to you." While a friend is speaking, do you rehearse your response in your mind, or do you quietly absorb what he or she is saying? If your friend shares a concern or problem, do you quickly offer advice, or do you express understanding and sensitivity for how he or she must feel about the situation?