I Meet a Walking (and Talking) Black Hole

First off, let me tell you that the person who I will be writing about knows that I am writing about him, and he's OK with that. So, you can be OK with that, too.

Everything I'll be telling you is the absolute truth. Because you just can't make this stuff up.

I first met this man on the Internet. We became friends, and then, after we met face-to-face we discovered we liked each other. Thus began a nine year long relationship. Heck, that's longer than three of my four marriages lasted.

He was five years younger than me. I called him 'The Boy' in all my other writings about him, but he finally told me that he doesn't care what I write about him as long as I stop calling him 'The Boy'. Thusly, I have returned to my first nickname for him, My Walking Black Hole. You will see why this name fits him as we go along.

I wish I had gotten myself a younger man years ago. His, well, let's just call it his 'enthusiasm' was quite nice.

He was a homeowner. That was a big plus, in my estimation. It spoke to me of a man who was hard-working and responsible.

It wasn't until later that I found out how horribly wrong those first impressions can be. Of course, by then I was pretty much in love with him.

He was, at the time we met, 37 years old and had never been married. I thought the right girl had just never come along. Little did I realize the right girl had come and already gone so many times that I'm surprised there wasn't a revolving door installed in his house. They were smarter than I was, though. I stayed.

At first I thought he was putting on an act for me. Surely no men really walk out of their underpants and just leave them where they fall. Those are just jokes, right?

The first winter we were together, I came home from working 2nd shift at my job. The WBH didn't work that day. I came into the house from the cold outside and in those first few seconds before my glasses fogged up, I saw him aiming the remote at the TV to change the channel. The next thing I know, he's helping me off with my coat and shoes and he tells me that my dinner is just about ready.