Understanding Wild Horse Racing: Official and Unofficial Rules

The Wild Horse Race is a thrilling rodeo event at which 10 wild horses compete for audience applause by racing around the arena and trying to stomp the tar out of 30 lunatic cowboys. These cowboys (and the occasional cowgirl, but most girls are too smart for this) are tricked into participating by letting them believe they are racing to see which 3-person team can be the first to saddle and ride one of the wild horses.

The first time I saw this event, I was just nine years old, and was pretty smart for a kid. I remember thinking, "Why on earth would anyone enter in this event?" As I reached my late teens, however, my brains began vacationing in the same crevice that most teenagers' brains do, and I found myself anxiously awaiting my 18^th birthday. Not because I could vote or drink legally, but because I could finally enter the Wild Horse Race in the annual 3-day rodeo held every Labor Day weekend in western Michigan

That first year, I recruited two of the toughest guys I knew, who happened to be pretty good horsemen. At the rodeo grounds where we camped for the weekend, we met some of the other Wild Horse Racers the night before the first performance. They were nice enough, and gave us one piece of advice. If we drew a horse named Trash, we should just let her go. She's wicked and mean, and there was no sense in us getting hurt our first time out. We thanked them, but amongst ourselves we figured we were tougher cowboys and better horsemen than they realized, and agreed that if we drew Trash, we could win with her. Of course we did draw Trash. During intermission when the chutes were loaded, we all went down into the arena to halter our horses. I've never seen a horse jump up in the air and strike the chute in front of it with both front feet while simultaneously kicking the rear of the chute with both hind feet, but Trash did, and she did it so fast our eyes hardly registered the movement. Eddie said "Any way I can talk you boys out of this?" I was too busy trying to hold my water to answer, but Darryl reckoned we could handle her all right. We managed to get the halter and rope on her, and saw that as a good sign.