Wedding Etiquette Tip: When You Do Not like the Wedding Music

I was recently at a wedding when the type of music playing transitioned from waltz and love songs to rhythm and blues to rap. It was time to get the party started! The transition was noticeable and caught me off guard. I was not alone. However, I did not mind.

Other wedding guests however took offense to the new style of music. A mass exodus ensued. At this point, I will add I was at a mixed race wedding and the music that was not playing was definitely more pleasing to one race than the other was. When the music changed, one person looked visibly annoyed, grabbed his wife and stormed outside. I shrugged my shoulders and decided to get my "party on". Then I noticed the offended party begin to solicit other people to "boycott the music" and before long had a crowd of people standing outside sulking while others who did enjoy it were inside dancing.

This is bad etiquette. It was not his wedding. Sure, the wedding couple had some obligation to ensure that all of the wedding guests enjoyed the ceremony. With that being said, they also had to make the wedding something they would remember and enjoy. By choosing their favorite music to play during the wedding, they were sharing who they were as a couple with the guests. That should have been enjoyable within itself.

For someone who finds themselves at a wedding with music far too grating for their personal sensibilities, I have a few suggestions.

If you hate the wedding music that is playing at that moment look to see if the wedding couple also are offended by it.

If the wedding couple appears to be agitated by what the DJ is playing, offer to speak to the DJ for them.

If the wedding couple are dancing, smiling, and otherwise enjoying what is playing you can grin and bear it.

If pretending to enjoy yourself and the wedding music for three minutes is out of the question, then use the next three minutes to take a bathroom break or get a breath of fresh air (or a cigarette, if you choose,)

If removing yourself from the party momentarily does improve your mood and enjoyment of the party, do not then decide to revolt and pull others from the party.