Teen Advice: How to Tell If You're Too Possessive

Teens and possessiveness almost goes hand-in-hand today. One only has to look at the environment teens, and children in general, are being raised in to see problematic situations that culture teens to become possessive. There is a growing epidemic of single parent homes, high divorce rates, and dysfunctional households, often lending to a less stable environment. How can children learn what positive relationships are when the first and most important relationship they have front row seats to is non-existent or broken?

Teens learn what ideals they want in a relationship and how to develop a relationship by watching and absorbing their parents' relationship. So, if the home is broken or the relationship is negative, this will imprint insecurities about relationships on to the mind of the teen. They will not form a "relationship guidance and reference point" to help them formulate their own relationships. What they do learn is that they do not necessarily want what their parents' have, or do not have. Trust clearly becomes an issue, and it is known that a quality relationship is dependent on trust.

These insecurities form the foundation of possessiveness. The teen does not know what they want in a relationship, but they know they have to be in a relationship. Since they may not be able to look to their parents for relationship guidance, they look to their friends who are often misguided themselves. So together with damaged or poorly developed self-esteems, inadequate relationship role models, and a total lack of trust, teen cliques put together their own "relationship guide and reference point", and today, there is a trend amongst teens that has them needing to be in a relationship at all times because it defines them.