Being an Introvert in an Extroverted World

Do you know someone who can make a show-stopping presentation to colleagues, but is never seen at the company Christmas party? Who, despite the urging of family and friends, prefers to spend time alone? Who can carry on a lengthy, deep conversation with one or two people, but seems at a loss for words when put on the spot in a social gathering? Who would much rather complete a project alone than as part of a group? If so, you probably know an introvert.

INTROVERTS DON"T NEED TO BE FIXED: Introversion is not something that needs to be “fixed,” but ask any introvert how hard that is for the extroverts around him to understand. Extroverts have a terrible time understanding how anyone would rather stay home than go out with the crowd. How could they leave that young lady to eat alone in the restaurant? Surely, someone needs to intervene. Right? Wrong. I know. I am an introvert.

Marti Laney, a self proclaimed introvert and author says, “We’ve all grown up in an extroverted society, and there really is quite a concept of negativity attached to introverts.” I definitely think extroverts wrote the books on manners. It is perfectly acceptable to say you cannot attend a function if you are ill, but considered very rude to decline simply to spend time at home alone. Therefore, introverts get good at making excuses, or just not showing up.

WHAT IS INTROVERSION? Take the famous Myers-Brigg personality test and the first category you it defined is introversion or extroversion. Introversion is not a phobia. It is an orientation, one that is shared by at least 25% of the population. Introversion is not the same as shyness. Shy people tend to get nervous or anxious around others. Introverts are not usually anxious. They just prefer their own company to the company of others.