Great Ways to Stop Fighting with Your Teen Over Curfews

As your child becomes a teenager, she begins to gain a sense of independence. And along with that can come a certain amount of stubbornness. This can be a difficult mix when it comes to the crucial issue of what time your son or daughter comes home at night. Follow these proven tips for dealing with this important parenting challenge.

Start by entering into the process with an attitude of flexibility. No, I'm not saying you should let anything and everything go with your teenager. They're simply not ready for all of the responsibilities that come with complete freedom over their actions. But likewise, there's a good chance they're smarter, more mature, and more capable of making decisions than you realize. Give them some credit and some trust.

Couple this with a sprit of constant, open communication. When you assume things about your teen's behavior, you open the door for underestimating or overestimating her ability to make sound choices. By talking about things, you get a clearer picture of her motivations, intentions, and actions.

Next enlist your teen's friends and their parents. The issue of staying out late has an intense peer pressure element to it. No teenager wants to feel like she's being corralled back home before anyone else is - it's just not "cool." And that is the ultimate slap in the face. By coming to an agreement with friends and other parents, you can arrive at a curfew that doesn't leave anyone in the dork seat.

At the same time, consider the activities that your teen is engaging in at night. If it's a movie, dance, or other safe, carefully coordinated activity, then perhaps it might be okay for them to stay out later. But if it's a party, date, or similarly freeform situations, perhaps an earlier curfew could be agreed on.