How to Achieve a True Separation of Church and State

The doctrine of the separation of Church and State is constantly under attack in this nation, from those pushing school prayers to those advocating that the State maintain an established Church. It is a shame in this day and age that religion can dictate national policies, regarding everything from social domestic issues to foreign affairs. Yet, the separation between Church and State seems to be narrowing every year. Here are some ideas on how to achieve a true separation of Church and State.

One. Let's do away with the Bible in all state and federal court proceedings. Anyone who thinks that swearing on the Bible is going to ensure that someone tells the truth is out of their mind. There are laws against perjury, and they will have to suffice. If the penalties for perjury aren't severe enough, the wrath of an imaginary man in the sky certainly isn't going to do any damn good. If you must have the witness take an oath on a book of fiction, let it be the fiction of his choice. I'd choose Clive Barker's Imajica, for instance. It's a fantasy novel about Earth's four parallel worlds, with three main characters, including a genderless assassin. In other words, it's only slightly more believable than the Bible.

Two. It's time for God to get the hell off my money. If I earn a few bucks, it's mine to do with as I please, and I don't need to be reminded of anyone's batshit beliefs. And if money does have anything to do with God, shouldn't the poor get more of it? Isn't the Bible filled with stories about helping those in need? If it is indeed "In God We Trust," shouldn't we trust in his priorities? Didn't Jesus heal? Then why are the so-called Christians who are in power so set against universal healthcare? Sorry, hypocrites, but you can't have it both ways. Get God the hell off our money, or start practicing as your "Savior" preached. Until that time, how about "In Wal-Mart We Trust"? Every bit of currency ultimately ends up with them anyway, doesn't it?