I'm Too Chicken to Ask for a Raise

I'm positive I'm not the only one in this predicament. I'm sure plenty of people out there can raise their hands and say 'Yes, I am too goddamn chicken to ask my boss for a raise!'

See my hand? Its flying high. I am amongst the ranks of American workers who shake in their boots just thinking about the situation. Will he laugh in my face? Will he replace me? Will he find a reason to fire me?

But I need a goddamn raise, and just the thought of asking is frightening. I have played the scenario in my mind a million and one times this week. I turn around, face him at his desk of doom and ask 'hey boss, can I have a raise?'

No, that sounds so lame! Maybe I will write a letter? Lame, lame, lame! Fired, fired, fired! Ahhhh!

I definitely feel I deserve a raise. Yet for some reason I fear rejection. Rejection is part of it, but there is more involved in asking for that raise I so righteously deserve...there is the embarrassment. I feel like he should already know I am struggling to make a living... I mean hell he writes out my check every week...but for some reason I don't want him to think I am poor. He should know that though! Dammit!

I have been working for this company for 2 years. My first year I was part time, and I knew I didn't qualify for a raise, nor sick days or vacation on part time hours. However this December marks my one year status as a full time worker for the company.

The reason this has been itching at me is because I have never taken a sick day, never took a vacation. Recently though we had something happen at the office that forced me to have to leave early. Mind you this situation was completely out of my control, and was posed a health hazard if I remained in the office. So I went home early.

I figured this meant I would be payed seeing how the office HAD to be closed. I got my check the following week with the days pay missing. So I discovered the sucky way that I do not get sick pay...even for things that are out of my control. Just lovely.

On top of it when we are closed for a holiday, I do not get paid. I basically take a blow in my pay when the holidays arise. Holidays for me suck due to this cut in pay. Great!