3 Reasons You Don't Need a Restraining Order

Plenty of people are genuinely stalked, harassed, and put in danger by their exes. These people can and should seek the help of law enforcement so that they are able to live their lives in relative peace and safety. But how do you know if you should seek a restraining order? In my travels on many internet forums, I have seen a lot of people asking advice about this topic. Most of them, even according to their side of the story, don't have much of a case to present to a judge. If you don't have time or money to consult with a lawyer, sometimes it can be hard to decide whether or not to pursue a restraining order.

A restraining order requires that you apply at your local court, using forms and papers that you must sign in front of a court clerk. The clerk will take these papers to the judge, who will review your case. If you are applying for an immediate or "ex parte" restraining order, he will probably question you, and you will be required to legally swear that you are in immediate physical danger. Whether or not you are granted an ex parte RO, the judge will set a hearing date, and the court clerk will help you find a marshal to serve the papers to your harasser.

At the hearing, both parties will be given the opportunity to peaceably agree on the terms of the restraining order. If this does not happen, the judge will hear your case.

Keep in mind that the purpose of a restraining order is to protect you from physical pain or harm, or the threat of physical pain or harm. If you have received threatening emails or letters, save them - they will be helpful in making your case with the judge. Research the laws in your state regarding phone calls, and if you can legally record them without the other party knowing. If you can, do - and use the threatening ones at your hearing.

If you are not being physically threatened, think twice before you pursue this. Things to keep in mind: