Supermarket Sorry

I do not normally go to supermarkets or big discount stores, unless I have a very good reason, because I don't particularly like them. They underpay their workers, treat them like mindless drones, take away business from mom and pop stores and they also have bad sides. Like the jam filled donuts, which are too good to refuse.

One fine saturday afternoon I decided to treat myself to the aforementioned donuts. Disappointed by the fact that they would only sell a maximum of 5 per person, I proceeded towards the exit. "Go to the cow and not drink any milk?" I thought to myself. Lucky for me, I found a gumball machine in the vicinity of the exit door so I placed the coin in the slot, pressed the button and a red piece of gummy candy fell in my hand. And later on the floor, thanks to my clumsy hands. Don't know how old that gumball was, as it broke on impact with the ground. To my surprise, this seemed like joker's version of a Kinder Egg: it contained a small, dark, six-legged roach. Not particularly scared of cockroaches, I did not scream or jump onto a nearby chair. This is what customers around me did, thus alerting security and supermarket employees. I did not want to cause a scandal, as it was, after all, only a gumball. Enraged somehow by scared people surrounding me, I asked the security officer on location if I could possibly see the manager or at least someone in charge. I needed to get some things off my chest...it seems.

-Hello there, my name is John Edwards, I'm the supermarket manager. I've heard about your recent trouble with the gumball machine and let me assure you that our customers' satisfaction Is essential to us. That is why...

-Are you trying to bribe me already?

-Not at all. It is our way of making things more pleasant for you and...your family perhaps?

-Not married. My parents are away on holiday.

-I see. Well then let's start with the beginning...Tell me what happened.

-I bought a gumball from the machine next to the exit, it unfortunately fell on the ground and broke to reveal a roach in a fetus-like position.

-Wait, wait. So the gumball fell and then you saw the roach. Correct?