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What Makes a GREAT Dominant Partner for a Submissive?

One Submissive's List of Absolutely Necessary Traits and Ways to Find Out If He Has Them

By Caged Heart Publishing, published Jul 24, 2006
Published Content: 75  Total Views: 227,145  Favorited By: 21 CPs
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Rating: 4.5 of 5
Let’s say you are searching for your Dominant, your “One”. Sure, a full toy bag or two might be important – for a month, or a year, or, more likely a day. Floggers, cuffs and clamps can be purchased in a kazillion places, by any Joe Schmo with a credit card. But, what are the attributes and character traits that make for a great relationship with a Great Dominant? What about the behaviors that make the MAN worth considering as a life partner, or for that matter, a play partner on a Saturday night? Let’s not even call them behaviors. Let’s call them character traits and innate qualities.

Must Haves: Traits and Qualities of a Great Dominant That I Would Consider Accepting

Honesty
Trustworthiness
Integrity
Self-Control
Sense of Humor (even at himself)
Capacity to Love, Be Loved and to Express that Love
Desire to Learn and Grow, both for himself and for his partner
Dependability

Then, there are the innocuous, even silly traits that are different for every submissive. Does he adore classical music, and it grates on your ears? Is his favorite food liver and onions, while you would rather die that eat an organ that filters waste from mammals? (ok, that one is mine, but fortunately, my Master doesn’t even like the smell of liver, with or without onions) Is pink his favorite color to dress his submissive up in every day? Does pink make you retch? (ok, that one is mine too, but he can live without pink – that was part of the negotiations before we ever became a couple!) These examples are simply the ‘fluff’ of a relationship, but what about the inherent character traits that make a Great Dominant?

So, how do you know if he possesses the traits and qualities that make a great dominant?
First of all, take your time getting to know the man, not the role he might play in your life. Does he exhibit self-control? When he’s driving down the highway and someone cuts him off, does he rage and scream and try to ‘get back at’ the errant driver? Doesn’t sound like self-control to me.

Takeaways
  • He is not the owner of Fullocrap Industries? But, he told me he was!
  • If you have this burning (no pun intended) desire to experience fire play...
  • Take the time to know yourself, your needs, your desires!
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Comments
Comments 1 - 4 of 4
 
 
Good article.

Posted on 07/17/2007 at 8:07:00 AM

 
An article about what makes a great submissive would be good for those Dominants looking for a partner.

Posted on 08/23/2006 at 11:08:00 AM

 
I echo that

Posted on 08/22/2006 at 8:08:00 PM

 
Another down to earth article. It really is important to have a top who won't impose his desires just because he's the top, but will listen to his partner and respect her limits. Otherwise, she needs to walk away from that. Kathy

Posted on 08/18/2006 at 7:08:00 PM

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