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No "Ho, Ho, Ho," for Santa!

By Benedicta Droese, published Nov 17, 2007
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Just a few days ago, a mini image link on yahoo homepage caught my attention. Crap! Thanks a lot Don Imus... was my initial reaction. But once I ultimately figured things out, (all by myself thank you), by actually reading the full story, my pulse rate promptly settled back down to its totally awesome range. Hey, what can I say, us Americanos, just happen to love the resonance of "ho, ho, ho," and prefer it, to its wimpy alternative, "ha, ha, ha," which is being advocated by some Aussie power that be. In all seriousness, "ha, ha, ha," does not even have the same connotation or reverberation like "ho, ho, ho." For the freaking love of Mother Teresa, "ha, ha, ha" is something you would say to:

Numere Uno- that gullible kid who constantly falls for his father's "pull my finger," routine.
Numere Dos-that truly fortunate dude who always finds himself amid the stink trench of some lactose intolerant soul.

If the Aussies don't want their "Father Christmas" to use "ho, ho, ho," because it could potentially frighten children (what a load of horse crap)and is too close to "ho", a US slang term for prostitute (puleeze) what do I care?

However, there is one train of thought that haunts me...

1. If Christmas is really about the birth of Christ or rather a celebration of his birth and
2. Ha, ha, ha, is an onomatopoeia for laughing or laughter (methinks)...

Shouldn't the Aussies be concerned that:

Some religious extremist group would soon begin to launch protest grenades because, "ha, ha, ha, merry Christmas," sounds a bit like mockery...you know, as in, Thou shall not take the name of the Lord in vain? My opinion, someone in Sidney, Australia, needs a job, a real job or a life...or both...um, like, right now!

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Have we located the exact, singular, idiot who came up with this idea or is he/she hiding somewhere...like they should be? Any person who believes Santa calls them a "whore" when he laughs needs to be removed and shot. And, for Christ's sake, where are all the linguists who can explain this stuff...get of your butts and chime in...ok I will. A laugh is an abstract, non-verbal, emotional, expression whose perceived phonemic components do not distinguish meaning.

Posted on 11/19/2007 at 1:11:00 PM

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