Been There - Done that - Got the T-Shirt
November 22, 2007 by
A Travel Rant
Something has been bugging me for some time now, and I would like to get it off my chest. I travel. A lot. I travel a helluva lot. That's what I do in this world as a career. I write travel articles for various magazines. While I am vain enough to really, really enjoy seeing myNo. Seriously. You should see my house. It is filled with touristy crap goodness from Australia, Miami, Galveston, London, Latvia, Scandinavia, New York, Los Angeles, Estonia, Germany, Hong Kong, Thailand.... you get the picture. I know a lot of folks think this stuff is silly, but I love it. I live for accumulating all the schlocky tourist crap my house can hold - and then some. I want to go everywhere before I die. I want to see it all. I want to win the Been There-Done That- Got the T-Shirt grand prize.
I get T-Shirts, sweatshirts, shorts, sweat pants, little too-tight girly tops that make me look positively obese, ash trays, wall plates, stuffed animals, Aussie hats, wooden ships, post cards, statues, clocks... let's just say that the most expensive part of our travels is not the hotel or plane tickets. Oh no. It is all this junk. I even bring an extra suitcase just for tourist crap. Seriously. Ask my husband.
The problem is, I earn this crap. I have Been There and Done That so I can rightfully say Got the T-Shirt. Unfortunately, in my travels I have seen the most obnoxious things imaginable to me: New York t-shirts in a shop in Sweden; Los Angeles t-shirts in a Melbourne shop; London souvenirs in Kissimee, Florida; German stuff in Williamsburg, Virginia. And so it goes. What the hell is up with that? I'm sorry, but that just ain't riiiight....
My souvenirs are trophies to me. Been There - Done That - Got the T-Shirt.
Apparently the Been There - Done That part is no longer necessary, if it ever was, and that ticks me off no end. I was strolling through the French Market in New Orleans last year wearing a ball-cap from Stonehenge when some guy stopped me and asked me: Have you really been there?
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