A Warning About Being an Only Child

I'm an only child. Since I'm in my 50's the word "child" doesn't feel appropriate. But the point is, I have no brothers or sisters. My parents had me and that was it.

When I was younger, it wasn't a problem. While I wasn't spoiled, I did have full and easy access to attention from my parents and my fair share of toys. I had enough friends that there was never a feeling of loneliness. And I think being an only child allowed my creativity to shine through, because when I was alone I found things to do to entertain myself - writing, reading, art.

But that was then. This is now, and now is not so pretty. Anyone reading this who is an only child knows that at this point, unless their parents are still of childproducing capacity, their fate as an only child is sealed.

But I have advice for those people and for people who are considering only raising one child.

First - think long and hard about having one child only. Why? Because if you're lucky you'll live a long life. And that's when only children suffer. Suddenly it's their full responsibility to care for a parent. There are no brothers or sisters to share the decision-making process or caregiving process should the parent become very ill or disabled, or if one parent passes away and leaves behind an aged spouse.

A friend of mine, also an only child, is spending all his free time visiting his mother in an assisted living facility, where she is not happy. But it's the best he can do for her, short of giving up his career and staying home with her. Not only is most of his mother's money being depleted to pay for the facility, he's now dipping into his own savings. There's no alternative, though. There's no family she can live with.

I know it may seem like a good idea in light of overpopulation to limit the size of a family. But for your sake - and the sake of your one existing child - consider having at least one more child, maybe more, if you can. You'll have plenty of visitors in your old age, and they'll have...a life.