Does Technology Harm Our People Skills?

A study at UCLA has concluded that as much as 93 percent of communication between humans is non-verbal Similar studies have come to similar conclusions, that less than 10% of all of our communication with people is verbal. About twenty years ago, however, the ways in which we communicated changed unalterably. With the advent of cell phones, and the internet, including instant messaging programs, blogging, and chat room, people began, like never before to communicate as much or more through text or words, than ever before, leaving much of the real stuff of communication by the wayside. There is no doubt that the availability of information travel has affected our culture and therefore our social skills. The question is whether our social skills are enhanced or harmed by the information age.

Recently I had a disagreeable episode with a friend. I had the privilege of hearing her phone voice on the topic that upset her (left on my answering machine) and then the displeasure of seeing her thoughts in verbiage, displayed on a screen. The difference between the two was astounding. Where her voice came into play, she was sad, and upset, and bewildered by something I had done, but in text she peeled the varnish off of the walls of my ancestors' coffins. We have all been there. When a person with whom we are upset is not there to confront in a more human way, we tend to allow our inner rage to take over and we emote freely and often times damagingly all over the page. I know in my case that I have said things to my relatives in print that I would never have the moxxy to say in person... and that doesn't mean I was right to send it in print.