Why Do We Perpetuate the Santa Claus Lie?

Parenthood unavoidably requires telling a certain amount of lies, or at least misleading statements, to your children. "There aren't any more cookies." "Your teddy bear has to stay home and take a nap." "Mommy and Daddy were practicing wrestling." "Ebony the kitty went to live with another family." (That one was after the cat was hit by a car.)

Sometimes these misleading statements can instill closure or avoid trauma in a child that may not be able to cope effectively with the reality of the situation. At other times, saying these things is just easier for Mom and Dad than admitting the truth.

But what about the Santa Claus myth? It has nothing to do with favorably "repackaging" an existing unfavorable situation. No child intuitively comes up with the idea of a fat man in a red suit flying around the world on a sleigh powered by reindeer, stealthily sliding down chimneys and leaving toys without being discovered by even the family's schutzhund-trained German Shepherd. Adults are the ones who came up with that image and propagated it.

So why do we fabricate this rather outlandish story for our children? The obvious answer is that it might coerce our children into behaving. But if we practice this same method of using material goods to bait our offspring into obedience throughout the year anyway, why is the fat man myth necessary at Christmastime?

LYING AS FAMILY TRADITION

The obvious answer is that it's a tradition, and sometimes you carry on traditions simply because your parents, and grandparents, and possibly great-grandparents, did the same. "If it was OK for Grandma Mildred, it's OK for us."

I asked my question of a friend with two small children and her answer was, "So all your children's friends will get to experience the mystery and magic of Santa Claus, but not your own kids?" Now I understand. We have to continue the lie because everyone else does. And sometimes parenting requires you to lie so your kids won't have a nuclear meltdown and drive you crazy.