Why, as a Christian, Christmas Season Makes Me Wish I was Jewish

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year?

Every year from about November 20 to December 31 I wish I were Jewish. Jewish holidays are respectfully and religiously celebrated. I am a Christian, and my religious holiday has been kidnapped. The problem is, my holiday was kidnapped by fellow "Christians" as a misguided attempt at evangelism. Now, after shoving this religious holiday down the throat of the secular world, "Christians" have the temerity to get angry when the secular world wants to make the holiday, well, secular. If you wanted to keep "Christ" in Christmas you should have kept the holiday in the home and church!! (Yes, this sentence warranted two exclamation points, a practice I normally decry).

These "Christians" do this every year. This argument outrages me. It makes me want to take your light-up plastic baby Jesus from your front lawn and throw it through your gaudy-light-lit window.

First of all, Jesus was not born on December 25th. The decision to celebrate Jesus' birthday on this date was not based on the Bible, at all. Most biblical scholars place his birth date in March or September. In addition, Jesus' birth was not celebrated by early Christians; in fact, "Christmas" was not celebrated until the fourth century CE-give or take four hundred years after Christ's birth. Christians declared this day a holiday in order to drown out/counteract the Roman winter solstice festival of Saturnalia, which took place December 17 to 25. This declaration also thus allowed Christians to join in all the fun. How hypocritically funny that "Christians" are angry that secular society is now trying to celebrate a winter holiday. How dare they do so on Jesus' birthday? Oh wait.