Dangerscopes Gambling Horoscopes: January & February 2008

Dangerscopes are Horoscopes with a gambling edge!

Aries (3/21 - 4/19)

Beware of: Sheila, confetti, fake eyelashes, broken glass, and easels

Not having such a great start to 2008 has made you feel insensitive to the needs of others. Take it out on the slots because you need some alone time to get your head together. You won't win much but it will be like therapy for you. The full moon on February 2^nd will have a romantic effect on you so get with your sweetheart and create some heat. Also, please get a pedicure before March you're cutting the sheets with those rough feet and long toenails of yours.

Leo (7/23 - 8/22)

Beware of: Charles, Raid, edible panties, glass cleaner, and cobwebs

I advised you to beware of Nair but you're a risk taker and now you know you have an allergy to the product. Try laser hair removal instead. It will cost you more, but you won't have to cake on makeup to hide unsightly blotches. Barack Obama who is also a Leo has been on your mind a lot lately, so I want you to take big risks and play craps. It will help pay off that expensive electric bill.

Sagittarius (11/22 - 12/21)

Beware of: Cornell, snow, shag carpet, crab legs, and baby powder

2008 has been good to you so far and your joyful side has been dominating your on edge side. If you want it to last longer do not bother with slots try a lil' Blackjack to hit the jackpot. Texas Hold'em has been your game, but you spent way too much on Christmas gifts and neglected to pay bills. Go ahead and get that tattoo of a horse, after all you're a stallion.

Taurus (4/20 - 5/20)

Beware of: Chad, roses, scented soap, crayons, and cooking oil

Sorry you had a horrible experience with hair weave over the holidays. Keep it real from here on out! The new moon on January 19^th is a good day for you to try a game of Spanish 21. If you're a chef a promotion is on the way and I would even consider opening your own restaurant you definitely have the discipline and work ethic to get the job done.

Virgo (8/23 - 9/22)

Beware of: Cathy, popsicles, lizards, leaky faucets, and tea