Why Katie Couric Should Not Have Been Chosen to Become the New Anchor of CBS Evening News

For some ungodly reason, CBS apparently decided that the one person in all of television journalism alive today who was most capable of carrying on their legacy of high quality reportage in the tradition of Edward R. Murrow and Walter Cronkite was…little Katie Couric. Andy Rooney—whom I normally try my best not to listen to—made a good point when he suggested that twenty million dollars a year could go to reopening news bureaus that had been closed across the world and hiring new reporters. Instead, that twenty million dollars will go to a woman whose biggest claim to journalistic fame is describing the gigantic helium balloons in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade each year.

Katie Couric has this image of every woman wanting to be like her and every man wanting to date her. The first is ridiculous, the second is beyond belief. I personally know of no man who finds Katie Couric desirable. In fact, it used to be a common joke around my house that whenever Couric’s red-lipsticked visage appearance on our television screen that I would say, “There’s the little clown.” She looks like Krusty the Klown from The Simpsons! Desirable? Sexy? Maybe in the bizarro world where Superman is evil and George Bush is smart.

Over three years ago I predicted that American troops would still be in Iraq five years later, that democracy would still be a pipedream and that, much like how Yugoslavia fell into ethnic civil wars, Iraq would be a morass of conflicting ideologies that pointed up just how clueless our leaders are when they consider Islam to be one unified religion. Today I make another prediction: Katie Couric will be gone from the CBS News anchor chair within two years.