How Can You Help the One You Love?

By Lorna Darden, published Jan 18, 2008
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Family, What exactly does that mean? Is it being related by blood you are their shoulder to cry on? If you ask me it's just a word, you love, respect, and admire your family but, Can it help when they have addictions? We put ourselves in this box thinking that just because we look alike and sound alike that we are the same, but in reality we differ, we differ on the inside. Love your family, Respect your family that's what we are told do and sometimes it's just not enough.

Giving love and support that's what we are suppose to do, expecting the same in return can be not as expected. How can you help the one you love? When all they do is push you away the lies, the deceit, you look pass because they are family and what do you get in return? More lies, more deceit. You look on because you know it's going to get better, the drugs, the alcholism, and the gambling you can help them with. Hide the money, throw all the alcohol out, don't let them borrow any more money, you do this and they still end up getting and doing what they want to do anyway. So, How do you help the one you love?

 
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How Can You Help the One You Love?

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Comment on my blog: http://www.meetwealthyboomer.com/blog/lynnette_/lonely_177860.html

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Posted on 01/21/2008 at 5:01:20 AM

 
VERY cool YOUhave to love your self frist ARTME

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Posted on 01/20/2008 at 5:01:42 PM

 
I know it hurts Lorna, and I'm sorry for that; but the fact that you cared so much and did the best you can says a lot about what kind of person you are and you should feel good about that. I just wanted to let you know that your addict may want to quit more than anything and just cant seem to do it and that they may hate the fact that they're hurting you and that you may have to use tuff love to protect yourself or you may be actually getting somewhere by hanging in there and helping and only you know how you feel about that. I'm sorry for sounding cold at the beginning of my earlier comment---that did not come out right. I really do care about what your going through--I hope you understand. *****

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Posted on 01/19/2008 at 12:01:08 PM

 
I just want to say thank you so much for taking the time to even read my article. Yes I know that giving up addictions can be hard, my addiction is junk but I'm not going to lose my home or my pride because I got to have it. I know it's not as serious as drugs gambling, or alcoholism but, I believe there is a point when to stop and I know that some people don't have the wilpower like some other people. I see what you are saying but it still hurts.

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Posted on 01/18/2008 at 10:01:04 PM

 
Most of all--love yourself and don't ever become an addict---this is my greatest concern of all. Some addicts cannot change and so it's a gamble whether or not they ever will and you have to weigh all of the cost and benefits of trying to help them. Other addicts after many years finally find the strength to change and are totally indebted to the loveones who stood by them and helped them not to turn into an addict who couldn't change---there is a point of no return for some---that they would have crossed if it wasn't for the love of a wonderful family. Yet, when all is said and done---the best thing you can do is to never become one yourself and if that means only helping your addict to a certain point then so be it. Only you know how much you can give. That's my take; and this was a great article from somebody that I believe really and truly cares about their addict. I would give this a 1000 stars if I could---you deserve it!

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Posted on 01/18/2008 at 7:01:36 PM

 
I don't know if you have any vices, maybe you don't. Maybe your perfect. Some people are actually close to it although nobody probably is. If you do have any addictions try giving them up and see just how easy---or hard---it can be. I'm only saying this because some people with addictions (believe it or not) would hack off one of their legs or even both to be rid of them. That being said, there are others who enjoy their addictions too much to give it up. When other family members are hurt in the process (and they almost always are) it really hurts the addict who would hack their leg otf to be rid of their addiction; each case is different and only you can decide what kind of person your addict is and whether or not they are worth trying to help. Try not to be so hurt by the addict who would cut his/her leg off to be rid of their addiction, but protect yourself from the addict who enjoys their addiction too much to give it up. Most of all--love yourself and don't ever become an

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Posted on 01/18/2008 at 7:01:05 PM

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