Loss of Innocence: Race Relations Revisited

I lost my innocence at the age of fourteen to a boy a year younger than myself. I'm not speaking of something physical, although, in hindsight, the loss of my virginity may have been the preferred situation. No, I'm speaking of something with much greater consequences

It was the late 1960's and the young man I'm speaking of, we'll call him Adam, was a definite looker. The first time I laid eyes on him my heart jumped into my throat as hearts have a way of doing during the early teenage years. I didn't know him, but those big dark eyes, uncut dark hair and dimples made him someone I wanted to get to know. Back then we didn't call it chemistry, but I suppose that's what it was.

I spoke of him to my good friend, Katrina Scottman. We were freshman in high school and she usually sat near me since they tended to sit us in alphabetical order and my last name began with a "T."Katrina always had some humorous tidbit to tell about this person or that. She was very sweet, pretty, and witty and whenever I was around her I couldn't help but smile. She had big eyes and wore thick glasses which made them appear even bigger, and her smile . . . well, it just lit up the room. She was much shorter than I, and her skin was a deep chocolate brown. Even though I realized we were of different races, that thought never factored itself into our relationship. We were friends. We talked about our lives, our hopes, and our dreams.

We never spoke on the phone. Kat didn't have one. It didn't matter though because Katrina was a master note writer. Our notes were always artistically written and occasionally even illustrated. We folded them sometimes in the triangular shape used to play paper football and sometimes in the shape of a letter. Katrina could fold hers into an "S" for Scottman and I thought that extremely cool. Every day, either verbally or through the written word, she'd ask me how it was going with Adam. Had I spoken to him yet? Had I told him I like him? How long am I going to wait?

"Ain't nothin' gonna happen 'til you tell him you like him," she'd say.