How to Be a Better Wife, and Improve Your Marriage

I became a Navy wife at the same time I was released from the Army. My new husband and I were transferred to a remote duty station, with the nearest military installation being almost three hours away. I felt lost and alone and misunderstood, and felt that I had nowhere to turn. Life as a Navy wife was far different than life as a soldier. My husband worked long hours, and his co-workers and their spouses were less than friendly, which led to me feeling even more isolated. I ended up joining a reserve component of the military right after my active-duty tour with the Army ended, because I missed having friends. Due to the stress I was dealing with, and the loneliness, my marriage began to feel strained.

After 7 years of marriage and another remote duty station, we were finally transferred to a military installation this past fall. Over the last seven years, I have made a lot of progress in my quest to make my husband happy. I have become a better wife to my husband, and have been more supportive to him and his career as a result of years of growing and learning. The improvements in our marriage have enabled my husband to worry about me less, and concentrate on his career and his unit's mission more. Our marriage has become stronger, and we are able to parent our children better, thanks to my newfound attitude.

If you are a military wife, you may be looking to strengthen your relationship with your husband, as I was. Likewise, even if you are not a military spouse, you may also be looking to improve your relationship with your civilian husband. There are lots of ways to do this.

The best advice I can give is to be patient with your husband. It is easy to find faults in others, but not as easy to find faults in ourselves. Before you react to a situation, or a behavior, step back and imagine if the situation were reversed. Then decide how to react. By not acting in the heat of emotion, you can save a lot of hurt feelings and possible misunderstandings. If you are patient with your husband, you'll see a great change in his attitude toward you, and your marriage will improve, whether it was good or not-so-good to begin with.