Ten Family Friendly Jokes

Use at Your Discretion!

By Matt Nimerosky, published Sep 13, 2006
Published Content: 40  Total Views: 16,837  Favorited By: 10 CPs
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Rating: 4.5 of 5
It is a common misconception that we are not all going to get something out of every class we ever took in school. The following jokes refute that notion. After scouring my college notebooks, I have hand-selected my ten favorite jokes from literally hundreds of worthy candidates.

So, if you are someone who loves blank stares, appreciates a pity laugh, or simply likes to hear co-workers say, “wow,” while scratching their head and retreating slowly, please read on.

10. What do you call a bunch of pigs in New York City?

Central Pork 


9. Where do oysters go to gamble?

clams casino 


8. What do you call a cul-de-sac in a cemetery?

a dead end 


7. How did Dorothy get her boat across the pond?

the yellow brick rowed 


6. What do you call a 2-door sedan for poultry?

a chicken coupe 


5. Why didn’t the swimmers go into the scary lake?

it was for boating 


4. Where can you find Napoleon Bonaparte in a supermarket?

eggs-aisle 


3. How do you fire a shoe salesman?

give him the boot 


2. How do you prepare someone to work in a Slinky Factory?

spring training 


And this is the very first joke that I ever penned in a notebook. Without it’s popularity, I never would have had the urge to think up the other nine jokes.

1. What do you call a farmer’s wardrobe?

ranch dressing


Please try them out on other people. I find that every now and then, you will get a laugh. And when you do, it takes away the sting of the tomatoes that are being fired in your direction.



Did You Know?
I wrote all of these jokes when I should have been paying attention in class.
Comments
Showing Comments 1 - 3 of 3
 
 
Hey Hey Hey! The man said they were original! Sheesh. So what if he didn't say by who? A minor technicality. I don't know that I'd lay claim to them either. He was trying to leave himself a loophole and you go and try to close it up. Boy there's a critic in every crowd though I'm not sure if two people qualifies as a crowd. Anyway Matt, keep up the well.....I was gonna say good work but well you know.

Posted on 10/12/2006 at 5:10:00 AM

 
These jokes are 100% original, honest to goodness. I have the bruises to prove it from college buddies that had to put up with all of my bad jokes.

Posted on 09/13/2006 at 9:09:00 AM

 
Pretty decent. Are they really original though or did you get them from someone who got them from someone, etc.?

Posted on 09/13/2006 at 8:09:00 AM

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