Sick Sad Week: The Departed Career of Martin Scorsese & More

By Timothy Sexton, published Sep 18, 2006
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Oddly Enough, Wisconsin DOES Have a Law Against Eating French Cheese

You see, this is what happens when society makes fun of guys who wear glasses and attend Star Trek conventions. Instead of holding these kind of guys up as paragons of virility, they are transformed into dead-eyed, sexless geeks that no girl is quite willing to drop her thong for. Nicholas Grunke apparently got so turned on by the sight of an attractive young girl whose story he saw on television that he worked not only himself, but two friends into a frenzy to track her down and have sex with her. There were two problem. One, it’s highly likely he would have had to force the young woman to have sex with him even under the best circumstances. The second problem solved the first, however: she was already dead and buried. Yes, that’s right, three men plotted to dig up the corpse of a young woman whose image they saw on television for the express purpose of having sex with her dead body. But wait, it gets even sicker and much sadder. The judge was forced to throw out charges of attempted sexual assault because Wisconsin has no law against engaging in necrophilia, and since the potential victim was dead there is no legal justification for assault against her.


Yet Another Reason Why Electric Locks Should Be Optional

Sick Sad Week: The Departed Career of Martin Scorsese & More

The wave of the future.

Credit: Timothy Sexton

Copyright: Timothy Sexton

Takeaways
  • Winsconsin judge throws out sexual assault on a corpse because there's no law against it.
  • Advertising is now coming to you stamped onto the food you cook. Where will it end?
  • Martin Scorsese has a new movie coming out...ah, who cares anymore?
Did You Know?
Nancy Grace should be made this country's ruling judicial figure. She has the wisdom of Solomon. After grilling a woman whose child went missing, the woman committed suicide. Nancy Grace expresses no regret since she knows the woman is guilty. Imagine: We have a woman who knows all and sees all and she's being wasted as a shrill host of an overwrought CNN newscast. A person with this kind of talent should be the arbiter of all justice in America.
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I'm always terrified of that thought whenever I go over the Bay Bridge. But I comfort myself with the knowledge that if I go off the Bay Bridge, I'm going to die on impact, no question.

Posted on 09/19/2006 at 11:09:00 PM

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