Hey, You Stole My Personality!

Years ago, (in 2004 to be precise) I went through the single worst break up of my life. It was a textbook case of best friends ending up dating after what I can only call an "admiration from afar". It was one of those movie-like situations. Girl is dating wrong guy, friend of wrong guy likes girl, etc. It's never how it looks in the movies though, and it never resolves itself as neat and clean. In fact, I'd say something was wrong with all three of us. (Guys, if you're dating a girl and her best friend is another guy...something is emotionally amiss somewhere.)

Anyway, ridiculously long story short, I flaked. It was too soon after my break up with wrong guy which completely crushed me and things were moving way too fast with new boyfriend/former friend guy. I asked for space, and former friend guy/new boyfriend gave me the continental divide. It was quite possibly the single most depressing time in my life for a bevy of other reasons too. I was living alone and was utterly lost. Which I guess, who isn't at 22?

Today, it all seems so far away. As I write this, I'd like to think I'm older and wiser. And thank God (literally) dating is a thing of the past for me now as I am married. I can look back and see every place where I went wrong and know exactly what I would do differently. But that doesn't make it any less cringe-worthy. The thing was practically a divorce, with friends taking sides and some friendships never recovering from the event.

Oh yes, it was an event. I actually had the phrase, "I know what you are now." lobbed at me via email. As though my ex had peered through my window and seen me unzipping my person costume and emerging as a snake. (Say, that's not too far off from what he probably told people...I have enough to say about dating and what NOT to do that I could write a book.)