How to Be a Good Spouse

When a marriage fails, there is always one and only one cause: one spouse stops trying. It might be that one of you takes the other for granted. It might be that one of you is so troubled by stresses outside the marriage that it contaminates the relationship. It might be any number of things. But, in the end, what it all comes down to is one of you cuts the other off. It always ends the same way; one breaks the other's heart with a thousand little cuts of neglect, and that builds a resentment between you that seems insurmountable. Then, you give up, and it's all over.

You might say that one spouse gets selfish. He or she turns his or her attention inward, focusing on his/her own wants, desires, and problems. Sometimes, that spouse will feel bitter toward the other whenever that other, who is supposed to be the single most important, beloved, and valuable person in his/her life, needs that love the most. That's when the problem turns critical.

Rule #1: Put your spouse first.

This is the first rule because it is the most important. Put your spouse first, ALWAYS. That is, at its most basic level, precisely what love is. Two people, so devoted to each other, that they will each drop anything and everything whenever the other has a need. And that rule works both ways; your partner needs to put you first too.

It might seem like you're giving up yourself. In a way, you are. But, if you both do this, you will get far more in return. You'll feel gratified, and you'll get everything you could have ever wanted. Most of all, you'll be happy, and feel loved.

Has your spouse ever done something sweet for you, like make you breakfast in bed? Sure, you could make pancakes yourself without much effort, but isn't it so much nicer to have them made for you?

Not only is it one less thing for you to do, but it is one more thing that shows you that he/she is putting you first; that he/she cares enough to do that for you. If you both do the same, and go above and beyond for each other, you'll both feel rewarded, appreciated, and blissful.

Rule #2: Appreciation works wonders.

When you first fall in love, nothing else matters. If you want to stay in love, you need to learn that, in truth, NOTHING else matters.

Credit: Public Domain

Copyright: Public Domain