Abusive Relationships and Inspirational Love

About five years ago, I met a guy named Marco at a art gallery. We talked about our difficult childhoods, our dysfunctional families and living the stuggling artist life. Plus, we bonded over artwork, wine and cheese. Now I wasn't expecting to start dating again, especially after getting smacked around by my ex for four years prior to meeting Marco. But within days of meeting him, not only did we start dating, but Marco and I moved in together. When my girlfriends found out, they were extremely shocked, mainly because none of them thought of me as the spontaneous type. My artist friends were very concerned as well, because I started spending all of my time with Marco instead of doing my artistic stuff. But I could care less. I felt that I found the guy of my dreams-or so I thought.

Marco and I had our first fight six months into our relationship. It was over our wedding plans. The look in his eyes terrified me greatly. That should have been the clue to walk away right then and there. But I stayed, mainly because Marco needed me. Shortly after that, he started hitting me. Some time after that, I started mixing wine with my seizure medication and also started the cycle of bingeing and purging. Meanwhile, Marco also started drinking, but it never affected his artistic output. He kept on making and selling artwork, playing concerts at coffeeshops and so on.

The beginning of the end of the relationship came when I found out that I was pregnant. I had to decided whether or not to bring a innocent life into a world of two alcoholics in an abusive relationship. So, I chose to terminate the pregnancy, which went against every one of my Christian beliefs, but I was too far away from my childhood faith by then to care. Two weeks after the abortion, I packed up my stuff and walked out of Marco's life for good.