We Must Take Responsibility

As we mature we ultimately have experiences that make us the people we turn out to be. Some of these experiences can be traumatic, some can be rather wonderful. At some point in our lives there comes a time when we must realize we are responsible for some of our experiences.

One of the toughest things to do in life is to sit down, reflect on our lives, recognize a pattern, see our faults and accept them. That acceptance leads us to change and growth. We can never grow if we do not look at ourselves and see where we need to improve. If you continue through life thinking you are perfect and there is no need for self reflection, you are destined to repeat many of the experiences in the future.

Take my ex husband for one. When we were married, we were going through a pretty rough time for awhile. Not wanting to easily give up I suggested we go to counseling and he agreed. Great. I set the appointment and we arrived ready to make a go of this marriage.

During our session, the therapist told my then husband in no uncertain terms that there were some deep seeded issues that he recognized needed addressing and he offered to treat my husband alone in one on one sessions. Well it was as if the man told my husband that he was the worst person on earth. The ex became very introspective and quiet for a week after the session. I was beginning worry but I was also glad that the therapist recognized the flaws that needed to be brought out bcause if I were to have brought this up he would have surely dismissed me. Now, he was forced to look at himself and realized he was flawed.

Apparently that was a little too much for him because after taking the week to reflect on what transpired in the therapy session, the ex decided he did not want to go back to that Dr. and instructed me to find another therapist.

I felt that was the worst mistake ever. Self relection is not always pretty but you can not run from who you are. Shortly after, we separated then ultimately divorced.