Is it Okay to Let Your Child Cry?

No loving parent likes to see their child cry. It is the most natural thing in the world to want to comfort them and to dry their tears. However, crying is a normal, healthy thing for children to do. Indeed it's a normal, healthy experience of humanity for people of all ages.

Our society is inclined to encourage kids to feel foolish for crying as they get older - and this in turn results in them not being able to express their feelings. They learn to become very efficient at locking them away. This applies to boys in particular. They get the message early that it's seen as being sissy and babyish to cry in front of other people. So they become increasingly adept at stifling their emotions. Their sadness is buried deep inside. They build up a wall which not only keeps the tears contained - but the feelings as well. Indeed, they don't even talk about the feelings. Tragically, this is bound to contribute significantly to increased rates of depression - and even suicide - in our modern society.

So it is okay to let your child cry. It's also okay to give them a bit of sympathy. That's not to say you mollycoddle them or encourage them to wallow in self-pity. They do need us as their parents to cheer them up and, if appropriate, jolly them out of their misery. They certainly need us to discuss with them why they are crying and give any advice that may be needed, according to what they are crying about. They need our warmth and understanding. They certainly should not be given the message - or even the impression or inference - that their tears are unacceptable or silly.