Kelly Spies Lives Behind a Billboard?

When I asked Kelly for an interview she immediately said yes and invited me over to her house in suburbia. As I was steering my rented Porsche towards her street I was thinking about her. We have a lot in common, Kelly and I. I, like her, like to tackle unusual subjects too. She definitely has a sense of humor and sounds like a lot of fun. What interesting people AC has, I thought to myself. Yes, I was fully planning to reveal the real Kelly for all to read.

Although all houses in the street looked the same, I couldn't help noticing the Spies' residence immediately. A billboard the size of a small office building obscured the house completely. I could not believe it! The picture was of her bright-red picture on her CP page! Yes, that one. "That woman will go to any lengths to advertise herself" I thought. "No wonder she gets all the page views."

While I was pondering, Kelly's husband was in the process of driving slowly off the driveway. "Any slower than that and and the car stands still" I thought. But the door in the middle of the billboard opened and Kelly was there. I tried to look professional with a notepad and pencil but I was pretty nervous inside; anyone who has over 20.000 page views is in my view a celebrity and Kelly has way over 330.000 or so., heading towards 400.000. I felt I was in illustrious company here.

Kelly showed me around, chatting and I felt more at home now. In the middle of the living room there was a huge cabinet displaying jars, packets and cans with chocolate in them. "Gosh Kel, I didn't know you liked chocolate that much" I said. Kelly smiles and winks. "That is not exactly for eating MJ". I smile back, but I get the feeling that I'm missing a very important clue here.What the heck is she doing then with all that chocolate? I have so much to learn from Kelly and hopefully after this interview I'll have all the answers.

So while seated on the black sofa I asked her:

Kelly, you told us your avatar is only half of the picture. The other half has Simon Cowell on it. You told us that Simon wasn't real. Somehow I can't believe that. You look as if you couldn't believe your luck. Now, once and for all: what was going on between Simon and you?