Can John Edwards "save" Barack Obama?
The Clinton campaign has proclaimed that Barack Obama has a problem, that he doesn't appeal to the "blue collar" white old/female/bigot voters. Of course, the fact that he won North Carolina, a state featuring a huge population of blue collar, white voters,
many of whom are old and/or females and/or bigots, by a crushing majority makes no nevermind: he lost West Virginia by a titanic margin.
So, clearly, it must be the blue collar thing. What else could hurt him so badly there?
In the words of West Virginians, young and old, male and female, and definitely white: "It's the racial thing - he's not like us, and I'm not comfortable with that." "He's a Muslim, isn't he?" "I can't vote for anyone who is named Hussein. I've had enough of their kind."
What, nothing about guns?
Well, at least we know bigotry and ignorance aren't the problem.
But wait! In this dark moment, where Hope itself is about to falter and fail (fail to win an unanimous victory), here comes the One man who can save the day!
Enter John Edwards. Here, arriving at Barack's side in just the nick of time, comes the man who was considered THE blue-collar candidate just a few months before ($400 haircut aside). He stood up for the working man, he was the physical embodiment of all that is good and righteous about the White people. He is as non-Muslim-looking as they come; he's handsome, charming, and definitely somebody that the 'We're not bitter, clingy people with antipathy' people (who are bitter clingy, and filled with antipathy) can get behind.
In a contest where being in 2nd place means you're 'clearly the obvious Choice' for the party's nominee, having come in 3rd must be the equivalent of Divine Ordination. Does anybody smell... running mate?
So, clearly, it must be the blue collar thing. What else could hurt him so badly there?
In the words of West Virginians, young and old, male and female, and definitely white: "It's the racial thing - he's not like us, and I'm not comfortable with that." "He's a Muslim, isn't he?" "I can't vote for anyone who is named Hussein. I've had enough of their kind."
What, nothing about guns?
Well, at least we know bigotry and ignorance aren't the problem.
But wait! In this dark moment, where Hope itself is about to falter and fail (fail to win an unanimous victory), here comes the One man who can save the day!
Enter John Edwards. Here, arriving at Barack's side in just the nick of time, comes the man who was considered THE blue-collar candidate just a few months before ($400 haircut aside). He stood up for the working man, he was the physical embodiment of all that is good and righteous about the White people. He is as non-Muslim-looking as they come; he's handsome, charming, and definitely somebody that the 'We're not bitter, clingy people with antipathy' people (who are bitter clingy, and filled with antipathy) can get behind.
In a contest where being in 2nd place means you're 'clearly the obvious Choice' for the party's nominee, having come in 3rd must be the equivalent of Divine Ordination. Does anybody smell... running mate?
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Orchiolum
Posted on 05/27/2008 at 7:05:17 PM
Kim Linton
Posted on 05/15/2008 at 3:05:23 PM