Dances with Bees: A Humorous Look at Bee Keeping

Well, it’s coming on to that time of year again; it’s time to start thinking about harvesting some honey. I know it’s the right time because I just finished my last jar of last year’s crop with some hot buttermilk biscuits a few minutes ago. And being out of honey is just against the rules with me, it just won’t do at all. Nope. I get a little nervous just thinking about being out of it; like a smoker without tobacco or a drinker with an empty glass. It just makes me get a little antsy, I guess you would call it.

I have been keeping and tending bees quite a few years now. It’s a good hobby that produces its own rewards. People I know that I have not seen in a year, suddenly start showing up at the house and hinting around about how divine it would be to have a little honey for their biscuits. It’s kind of funny how that works. You can’t find one of those devils when it’s time to throw square bales of hay or hoe the tobacco out. But just like magic, they appear on your doorstep when word gets out that you were seen fooling around in a beehive. Pretty peculiar, isn’t it?

I usually make pretty good money for my troubles. I get $5.00 a pint or $8.00 a quart. Last year, I got 27 pints out of one hive and sold every jar by dinnertime (that’s lunch for you city folks). The reputation of my honey precedes it and it’s not hard to move at all. The hard part is having enough left to do me over the winter! But I manage to stash away 3-4 quarts when they aren’t looking, and that’s plenty for me.

While thinking about harvesting some honey a while ago, I reviewed some bee keeping basics:

*  Never open a hive on a cool day, it can chill the brood of unhatched bees and this is not thought of highly by the rest of the hive.

*  Never open a hive on windy, overcast days for the same reason.

*  Always open hives in the middle of the day, so the majority of field bees are gone gathering nectar and pollen.

*  Always move in slow deliberate moves so as not to startle the bees.

*  Always have plenty of cool smoke available to soothe the bees.