Sex and Proper Public Etiquette, Florida's Dumb Laws

Florida, known as The Sunshine State, is a place of warm sandy beaches that attract 1000's of tourists each year. Law makers aware of the money that tourism bring to the Florida economy passed laws (dumb laws) that would ensure proper sexual conduct and public etiquette from it's citizens so as to leave the tourist with a good opinion of Florida, and hopefully have them return for another vacation.

These dumb laws of Florida also apply to tourists visiting their lovely state, so bear in mind when you visit Florida, you must abide by these dumb laws.

Corrupting the public morals is defined as a nuisance in Florida, and is declared a misdemeanor offense. You will want to be careful and avoid corrupting public morals by abstaining from having oral sex. Oral sex is illegal. The missionary sexual position is the only position that is legal, however a man may not kiss his wife's breasts at any time. Unmarried couples may not perform any lewd acts or live together in the same residence. You may not commit any unnatural acts with another person, and above all, do not have sex with a porcupine, that is illegal in Florida.

After you are done 'not' corrupting the public morals, you may feel the need to shower, be advised that it is considered an offense to shower naked in the state of Florida.

Ladies, if the salty water and air of Florida takes it toll on your hair and you visit a hair salon, don't fall asleep while under the hair dryer. You and the hair salon owner could be fined for that.

Gentlemen, if you plan on attending a formal event while in Florida, make sure that your formal wear has sleeves. Florida's dumb law state that it is illegal for men to be seen publicly in a strapless gown. Yes, that's men and strapless gowns.

After a relaxing swim in Florida's ocean, you may feel like singing. Be sure and change out of your swimsuit first, it is illegal to sing in public while wearing a swimsuit.