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Should I Follow My Heart or Listen to the Voice of Reason Inside My Head?

Relationship Expert and Psychic Zuri Advises a Client on the Cons of Dating a Boyfriend with a Peter Pan Complex

By Ask Zuri, published May 24, 2008

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Dear Zuri:

My ex-boyfriend recently broke up with me about 2-3 weeks ago. I had a lot of firsts with him, sexually, emotionally, etc. He had nothing when I met him -- all he did was play video games all day long, everyday. After he met me, he got a job, and I helped him learn how to do things for himself (iron clothes, chores, etc). His insecurities would surface when I was not around him because he would get child-like and selfish. After a couple of months, I lost my job and he wanted me to not work for a while so he could help take care of me and my finances. But, shortly after, he decided to quit working. So we were both out of work, and he wanted to spend all our time together at his house. Then my relationship with his family soured. They found ways to blame me for their own shortcomings and claimed that I had ruined my boyfriend's life when all the while, I had strengthened their relationship with him since he wanted nothing to do with them before he met me. The family drama had gotten so bad that he had no choice but to let me go stay with my family. After I left, my job search improved, but he would not make any effort to call because he would be too busy playing video games all the time. I was always wrong for not doing what he wanted, and even when I did, he still found something else for me to be at fault for.

After no contact for a couple of days, he broke up with me. We are currently not on speaking terms because he recently contacted me wanting sex and I refused. We should be fixing the problems and not having sex. I am finally seeing my worth again and putting my foot down. Our relationship was doing well and thriving when I was leading it, but it soured when I let him have control of it. Despite all the ups and downs, I still love him a lot, and I believe that he loves me too. What are the chances of us getting back together?

- VI 3/82 and DH 11/82

Dear V:

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