What to Get Your Redneck Dad on Father's Day

With Father's Day fast approaching, many of us are scrambling about, trying to find the perfect gift for a cherished family member. The point of any gift is to remind the recipient of his or her connection with you, and hopefully to create a positive emotional response. Those of us with Rednecks in the family know that this is truly a daunting task, as Rednecks generally show emotion only during showings of Old Yeller and songs by Hank Williams. So I'm going to go over a few Father's Day gifts for all the Redneck dads out there. Hopefully you'll see something that will bring a smile to his weather-beaten face.

Many of you, especially those outside America, might not have heard of a Redneck. According to Urban Dictionary.com, the term refers to "a working-class man from the Southeastern United States who spends a lot of time performing manual labor outside. Thus, he received a 'red neck' from the sun."₍₁₎ Jeff Foxworthy, though, defines the class more succinctly. He describes being a Redneck as having a "glorious absence of sophistication."₍₂₎

There are all kinds of suitable Father's Day gifts available for Redneck dads - you just have to know what to search for. Your average Redneck takes great pride in his pickup truck. It's the type of vehicle that shows that he has an occasional need to haul wood or large dogs from one place to another, and that he fully supports global warming. You can help him look even more virile by purchasing a set of TruckNutz. This small rubber device looks like the southbound end of a northbound bull, and hangs off the back of a truck's bumper. Its purpose... actually, I have no idea what the purpose of this device is. But it's phenomenally popular among Rednecks. One set costs about $15.00.