Corporal Punishment for College Kids?

What next? Corporal punishment at the workplace? No, wait; I skipped a level: grad school! Who in their sane mind endorses corporal punishment for college kids? I'm sure there exist people who like this idea. THINK! Think about the repercussions that corporal punishment in college would create. THINK! The armed forces don't even employ corporal punishment! (100 pushups in the pouring rain don't count.)

Corporal punishment delivered to college kids would, first of all, create tremendous distractions, especially if college students struck back! Because men are more likely to hit back than women, it's logical to conclude that most recipients of college corporal punishment would be women. And most of the college men getting corporal punishment would be small in stature. Think anyone on the college football team or swim team would ever receive corporal punishment?

Still like the idea of corporal punishment for college students? Check out these outcomes:

What if the college student is 35 years old? What if the college student is 80? Yes, old people have been known to attend college to finally get a degree. Suppose that little old lady is talking during a lecture, and the six-foot-tall male professor decides to whack her one? Or, what if he refuses because she's old and small, but then hits a healthy looking 20-year-old woman? Suppose most of the college students this professor strikes are women between 18 and 22? Do you smell an age discrimination lawsuit? And gender, too.

Are college students in wheelchairs exempt from corporal punishment? Imagine if a student in a wheelchair is being disruptive, cracking jokes during a lecture. And his able-bodied cohorts join in on the fun, and the irked professor hits only the able-bodied students. Do you smell a lawsuit of discrimination against able-bodied students? Or what if he DOES hit that little guy in the wheelchair?

Let's not forget that huge can of worms called racial discrimination. What if the professor is white and he hits a black student? I needn't say more.