Top Ten Gift Ideas for Rednecks

Perfect Gifts for the Hillbilly

1. Toilet seat-The hillbilly in your family will be ecstatic when he rips open his or her new redneck Christmas gift. Now, he or she will be able to play hillbilly horseshoes forever. Hillbilly horseshoes is a very popular game in every redneck community. Watch him or her smile a crooked toothless grin when they open one of their favorite games this Christmas. Approximate cost of hillbilly horseshoe, free if taken from the Seven Eleven down the street.

2. Four soup cans and four boards-This gift is often given to newlyweds in the hillbilly community. A simple gift for the redneck that is soon to be getting married is the hillbilly bed frame. The cans and boards can be used to setup the hillbilly bed frame for the newly married couple, but beware too much bouncing may cause the cans to bend under pressure.

3. Aluminum foil-Every high-tech hillbilly on your Christmas gift giving list will appreciate this thoughtful redneck gift with gratitude. Aluminum foil has been used for years in every hillbilly community and household to improve on television reception. Buck Mix of Dry Springs, Kentucky says,” By using aluminum foil on my antenna I am able to pick up most of my local channels in the area.” “Just wrap the aluminum foil tightly around the top of your rabbit ears for the best results.” Buck’s wife, Bernice says, “By wrapping aluminum foil around my dentures I can hear all of the Jeff Foxworthy, redneck games broadcast in my head.”

4. Hillbilly three-piece chicken dinner-Give this gift to that special redneck gift in your life for a wonderful laugh. You must get three kernels of corn, wrap them tightly in your hand, ask your unsuspecting friend, ” Would you like a three piece chicken dinner?”, and now for the punch line hand them the three pieces of corn.