A Meaningless Visit to the Psychiatrist

It was 2:00 in the afternoon. Dr. Harold Jenson, the psychiatrist, was seeing his 2:00 appointment. The patient's name was Bob Ross. He was a burly man. He wore a striped shirt with faded blue jeans. Bob had a barrel chest and thin brown hair.

"Good afternoon," said Dr. Jenson. "Please sit down. What's on your mind?"

"Not being here is on my mind. Listen doc, I don't need to see you anymore. I feel fine. In fact, I never felt better in my life."

"I see," said Dr. Jenson. "Go on."

"Things are going great at work. My wife no longer hates me. My two boys are fantastic. I've been sober for over a month. Life is grand."

"I see," said Dr. Jenson. "Go on."

"I'm being promoted to Vice President in my company. I'm getting a huge increase in salary. My family and I are going on a trip next month to Florida. Life is grand."

"I see," said Dr. Jenson. "Go on."

"I just won the lottery yesterday. I'm going to get $10,000. My youngest son is one of the top students at Almont Elementary. My oldest son is the captain of his high school football team. Life is grand."

"I see," said Dr. Jenson. "Go on."

"My wife made passionate love to me last night. She cooked me my favorite meal grilled chicken with fresh vegetables. She even invited my in laws over for next week. Life is grand."

"I see," said Dr. Jenson. "Go on."

"Wait just one minute. I'm paying you $200 an hour. All that you have said so far is I see and go on. This is ridiculous. My life is completely turned around. I don't need to see you anymore."

"I see," said Dr. Jenson. "Go on."

"Go on. Go on. Are you crazy? Did you hear one word that I said? I'm happy. Life is grand."

"I see," said Dr. Jenson. "Go on."

"No, I will not go on. I'm leaving right now. I've never spent so much for so little advice. I'm getting really upset."

"I see," said Dr. Jenson. "Go on."

"I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. You are a complete moron. For the umpteenth time, life is grand. I'll pay for this final session, but I'm leaving your office right now."

"I see that you are angry and agitated," remarked Dr. Jenson.

"You bet I am. You haven't said one constructive thing since I've been here."

"Hmm, for the remainder of the hour let's examine the source of your anger."