The Importance of Birth Order in Character Formation

Many parents are continually amazed at how each of their children have completely different personalities. The children are products of the same gene pool, born within a relatively short period of years and yet their characters are totally discrepant. Why?

Alfred Adler (1870-1937), an Austrian psychiatrist believed that a child's birth order within the family left an indelible impression that affected his personality. Adler believed that birth order determined the way an individual would deal with the people and situations that confronted him throughout life.

Firstborn children.

These children are natural leaders. They frequently score higher on intelligence and achievement tests than their later-born siblings, perhaps because they have had mainly adult company in their early years. Their expressive language skills will be developed beyond what is expected for their chronological age.

They are least comfortable with their own age group. They prefer being with older or younger children. Their best friends are likely to be the youngest or oldest in their own family.

First-born children are constantly seeking parental approval, and seem ever-driven to better their last accomplishment to maintain their special status. They are responsible, logical rule-followers, and often worriers, desiring to retain their privileged positions as the apples of their parents' eyes.

When a younger child is born, the oldest is dethroned. He may begin to act out to regain his parents' total attention. As the younger sibling matures, the oldest will either become a compliant nurturer or aggressive and bossy. He may adopt a strict, authoritarian attitude with younger siblings, and try to take on the role of surrogate parent.

These children enjoy their privacy and are quite comfortable being alone.

Middle Children.

These children will be opposite to the oldest child. They may feel that they lack a special place in the family, so their friends and peer group will be more important, especially in the teenage years.