Hell Ride

Great Poster, Great Cast, Crappy Movie

Is there anything good about this movie? Sure. Some of the actors are definitely on their game and rise above the ridiculousness of the material. Michael Madsen puts on his Nice Guy Eddie persona for the role of The Gent. Michael excels in this kind of role, and he is a funny fight scene between him and Eric Balfour ("24") which helps redefine the term "tough love." Dennis Hopper has a small role here as Eddie 'Scratch' Zero, and he is always a crazy hoot to watch as he channels his "Easy Rider" mojo while riding his motorcycle. David Carradine is barely in the movie, but he has a strong presence here just like he did in the "Kill Bill" movies. David remains an intimidating presence however softly he speaks.

This movie has a very rough look to it which fits the movie and its characters perfectly. After being subjected to so many slick and sterile Hollywood productions where everything is spick and span, it is actually refreshing to see a movie that is willing to get down and dirty to the utter annoyance of studios trying to make everything as inoffensive as possible. There is nothing clean at all about this movie and its characters, and that proves to be both a positive and a negative.

In the end, this movie is irredeemable trash. I certainly didn't go in expecting anything epic. This was clearly meant to be a B-movie along the lines of last year's "Grindhouse." That movie unfortunately bombed at the box office, and this movie is not likely to do any better. Tarantino obviously wanted Bishop to make the best motorcycle movie ever, and it didn't happen. At best, this movie is a fight against what the late George Carlin termed:

"the continued pussification of the American male in the form of Harley Davidson theme restaurants. Harley Davidson used to mean something! It stood for biker attitude! Grimy outlaws and their sweaty mamas full of beer and crank, rolling around looking for a good time!"

Carlin would like the fact that "Hell Ride" fought against the pussification of that, but it doesn't change the fact that this is a crappy movie with a barely existent plot and schizoid characters who can never seem to figure out if they want to shoot their friends or hug them. It's not enough to have biker attitude. You need a good film to go along with it, and this was a blown opportunity. All the same, it makes me want to check out some of the biker flicks Larry Bishop became famous for. They certainly can't be any worse than this.

* out of ****