TV's Greatest Nerds

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The Professor: Perhaps the first TV nerd to ever be heroic. Just think how long the castaways on Gilligan's Island would have lasted without the genius of Professor Roy Hinkley. No washing machines, no radio after the first week, no giant robot that could walk underwater directly to Hawaii. Like Robinson Crusoe, those castaways would have been.

Steven Q. Urkel: Perhaps the quintessential nerd, Steven Urkel encapsulates the hidden fear of nerds that engenders such unquestioned and uncritical dislike of nerds by athletes. Urkel was clearly the smartest person in the room no matter what the room, but place him in a locker room and the divergence between his IQ and the next highest IQ was as vast as the divide between the honesty of a five year old and the honesty of John McCain. I'm talking freaking huge! Steve Urkel first entered into the consciousness of America during that immortal males versus females bowling match on Family Matters when the secret weapon that was Urkel was undone by the secret weapon of having Laura Winslow touch him. From that point onward, Steven Q. Urkel rose from simple nerd to proto-nerd, encapsulating the primal focus point of why nerds remain one of the few groups that it is still fun to make of: their brains scare the bejebus out of the average American, quantified by their leader, the biggest nerd-hating psycho of them all, George W. Bush.

The Nerd Trio from Buffy the Vampire Slayer: What Steven Q. Urkel hath wrought, Andrew, Warren and Jonathan took to the ultimate level. Moronic steroid cases notwithstanding, the reason that nerds take the brunt of the practical jokes in high school (the only higher level thinking most student athletes ever engage in) is because their power is feared. Brains will beat brawn every time, eventually. And those muscular troglodytes who pick on nerds the most know this in this hearts. The Nerd Trio on Buffy took being smarter than the guys who picked on them to heights that even Urkel could only have dreamed of. Only the awesome magical powers of Dark Willow were enough to stop them. Had it not been for the supernatural, the nerds would have ruled Sunnydale.

"The funny thing is, it's hard to remember the names of the kids you spent so much time trying to impress. But you don't forget someone like Margaret Farquhar: Professor of Biology, mother of six, friend to bats."
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